The Benefits of Singledom 6/3/19

By Richard Bleil

It was an interesting day today. I had two (count ’em…TWO) friends who wanted to meet up with me, one for lunch and the other for a late afternoon coffee (make mine a Chai latte, please). After tea, I decided to stop by (my friend had to go home to his wife) and have a nice Sashimi supper. While sitting there alone trying very hard to avoid soy sauce sprinkles on my all-too-expensive shirt, it occurred to me that there are, after all, some benefits to being single.

It is not my intention to argue that one lifestyle is better than another, that being single is better than being with a partner or vice versa. However, I am stuck in a life of being alone, being single. I tend to dwell on this a lot (in case you hadn’t noticed), and tonight, sitting in a Sushi restaurant eating Sashimi, I got to thinking about this yet again, and I realized that there are, whether single by choice or not, advantages.

  • You get to spurge on meals. Let’s be real, Sashimi is not cheap, especially in the middle of the country, over a thousand miles away from a coast. But let’s be real about this, if I’m alone and buy a meal that’s fifty percent more expensive than if I were on a date, I’m still coming out ahead in that i don’t have to buy two meals.

  • You get to decide on what you want to do. There is a popular adult cartoon that often quotes “I don’t care, I do what I want.” Do you want to stay in? Stay in. Do you want to go out? Go out. Do you want to eat junk food for a year straight and waste away into nothingness regardless of the damage you are doing to your health? Yeah, me, too.

  • You get to choose your own pets. This is more important than you might think. I had a puppy (a one hundred plus pound puppy) named Bella (I named her before that stupid movie) and a cat named Sir Purrsalot (I called him Purrsy for short). When I got married, my wife kind of let me keep Bella, but refused to take in Purrsy. I’m ashamed to admit that I had to put him down; there are just too many cats, and I couldn’t find anybody to take him in. If I knew my marriage was destined to be so short, I would have kept the cat and put my wife to sleep.

  • You get to choose your entertainment. My music tastes are, well, let’s say eclectic, but it’s not for everyone. I have a hard time with pop “music”. I think about you every time I get drunk? Seriously? This is a song?? And what’s with movies and television shows that are “gritty”, or make you think? I think all day long, and as a former forensic director, I’ve seen enough “gritty”. Give me something mindless that makes noise and I’m happy. I probably won’t even pay attention; it’s just sound to make up for the deafening quiet of being alone.

  • Vacations are easy to choose and inexpensive. You don’t have to buy gifts for your significant other, and as mentioned previously, you pay for only one meal instead of two. How can you beat that? And no more arguing of where you want to go; which family, if any, to visit on precious vacation time, going to Europe or staying stateside, it’s all your choice. It is your choice and yours alone where in the world you want to be just as lonely as home.

  • You can set your own hours. Okay, so maybe you have to get up and be to work on time, but when you eat, when you get up, how late you sleep in when you can are all choices for you and you to make. It’s kind of awesome to make up your own mind as to when you will go to bed alone!

  • Decide on your own frivolous expenditures. Do you like motorcycles? Games? Art? Music? Sports? Not only do you never have to get into “that” argument about wasting your money, but you don’t have to split the money on your partners frivolous expenditures as well. I like to game, and have about thirty pounds of dice. Is it overboard? Yes. Is it ridiculous? Of course it is, but that’s okay. You get to do your own thing all by yourself. See? Isn’t this fun?

Of course, I would give all of this up for a partner.

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