Had a date with an undertaker. I asked what her perfume was. She said formaldehyde. And, yes, as a chemist I do know what formaldehyde is.
Category: Humour
Famous 5/6/22
“Well,” he said in a serious voice, “I think you should get out of bed, come upstairs, and have some sponge cake with General Michael Miltstein of the Soviet Union.”
Boycott 4/24/22
write your political representatives demanding new legislature to boycott skeet shooting. This horrible and inhumane sport must come to an end.
Fool 4/1/22
the Three Stooges? How are those movies funny? Because they’re hurting each other? If I want to see a grown man slap another, I’ll watch the Oscars.
Words 3/31/22
In the modern age, we have modern situations that, frankly, I think we need new words to describe. For example, when you’re driving a safe distance behind somebody, and the person behind you passes only to slip into your safety zone.
Not My Fault 3/22/22
When the hooman opened the door, the tiny fluffball kitten walked past him and Bella and declared the home his. Yep, that’s how a cat adopts you.
Titles 1/22/22
yes, I am the Saint of S&M in the church. Science and Mathematics. Why? What were YOU thinking?
Star’s Review 1/11/22
Yes, indeed, he took me out of that stinky place with all of the filthy canines but if I didn’t want to go, I wouldn’t have. I just let him take me here so I could check out his house to see if it’s sufficient to fit my needs. Close call.
Picric Acid 1/2/22
I picked it up, and when I realized what it was, I quickly set it back down. Then, I immediately picked it up again so I could set it down more gently.
Old Teaching Injury 12/29/21
I can honestly look at somebody nowadays, and say, “oh, it’s an old teaching injury”. I mean, seriously, how many people can say that?